This morning, following my experience earlier this week, I formulated and executed a cunning plan:
I went to my favourite morning sandwich shop, and there made a crucial purchase.
I then continued on to the baffling, frog-addled, designer pie shop that so confounded me previously.
Feeling slightly smug I approached yon frog.."One BACON roll please kind lady!"
She looked at me quite frankly, as if I was a twat, but handed over the food.
Beaming with glee, I whipped out the two hot sausages I had purchased only moments before and stuffed them into the roll.
I proceeded to cram as much food into my mouth as possible while shouting/mumbling "This is our Waterloo!"
I then had to run as I am pretty sure she was calling the police. But that, ladies and gents, is how one deals with the French.